You are here

Tall Tails

An audition announcement for an upcoming production of Neil Simonâ??s Biloxi Blues in Alexandria, Virginia notes:

All men and the character of Rowena cast in the production will be required to appear on stage in underwear "or less."

With all the hoopla surrounding a Virginia bill aimed at cracking down on indecent underwear exposure, I couldnâ??t help but imagine a potential scenario if such a law were already on the books:

â??Oh, gosh, officer. I was just on my way to a dress rehearsal. I was running late and thought Iâ??d save time by arriving in full costume under my outerwear. And then, well, my car just died. Probably something to do with being gasoline-deprived.

"Anyway, I decided to start jogging the rest of the way, only a few blocks. I just had a hard time keeping my loose pants up, what with running and all. And, thatâ??s when I happened to catch your attention, I guess.

â??And well, officer, actually this isnâ??t the costume, but I thought Iâ??d run it by the director as a suggestion â??cuz, you see, I entirely support our State of Virginia. Just look at this pretty state flag emblem here.

â??Youâ??re asking me if theyâ??re worth a fifty buck fine...?"

Add new comment